From the ‘5 minutes to five o’clock’ department… Let the jokes begin…
Author: Mothership
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…how about now?
An update to the Are you ready? post earlier.
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Sandtastic!
Do you remember back to your childhood, getting excited about summer holidays, because like everyone else you were off to the beach? The water, the new toys you had got for Christmas (back when toys lasted longer than 43 minutes from opening) and best of all – making sandcastles!
You did pretty well; a bucket, a spade or two, and at the end of your hard labour was something to be proud of. A castle – complete with moat, spires, and even flags created with sticks found on the beach and pieces of wrapping from the contents of the chilly bin holding lunch.
This woman it seems, took things a little more seriously when it came to playing with sand:
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Are you ready?
Have you ever wondered how fast the pace of change really is? Have you had time to wonder?
The old saying is “knowledge is power”. From the earliest vestiges of mankind, through the middle ages and beyond, knowledge has been used for means of control. Those in power such as monarchs, politicians, and religious purveyors all used the ability to impart and disseminate knowledge to keep their position over the masses.
The chief tool used to accomplish this was the ability to read and write. The working class were kept uneducated, and their ability to congregate and share what they knew, and to become organised suffered greatly.
However, this has changed dramatically. In this day and age reading and writing is learned by almost all in first world countries, and is not the barrier it used to be. In fact, now the problem is not that information is scarce, but that there is so much of it, and sorting through it all is time consuming, and confusing.
With so many sources of information, and the World Wide Web giving so many the ability to communicate one to one and one to many, the issue has moved from a dearth of information to an overload, with much doubt cast on the validity or otherwise of this mass of words and pictures, still and otherwise. Pictures are ‘touched up’, documents are forged, statements are made that are so difficult to verify and validate.
Everywhere we look today there is more information than we could ever hope to process. Whilst the numbers in the video above have been bandied about in various places, this clip packages them together neatly, and is cause for thought. How can we ever begin to know what is real, what is important, what is relevant, and when will it end?
The part that stood out for me is that half of what is learnt in the first year of a four year technical degree is outdated by year three. What figure(s) made you sit up and think?
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eDay 2009
Do you have an old computer sitting around at home?
Is your Cupboard Of Discarded Gadgets getting a bit full?
eDay 2009 is this Saturday (12 September), giving you a chance to drop off your old PC, laptop, or mobile phone and be sure that it will be recycled safely and used for new gadgets.
Last year 946 tonnes of e-waste was dropped off for recycling at 33 locations.
This year there are locations throughout NZ including four in Auckland and one in Wellington (two, if you count Paraparaumu), and Christchurch. There’s a full list of recycling centres on this page.
You can even volunteer to help out – they’re looking for marshalls and movers on the day.
Computer circuit boards contain mercury, cadmium, and hundreds of other substances which leach into the environment when simply dumped in a landfill. Transportation and recycling will be carried out by certified disposal companies, so do something worthwhile for the planet, and dispose of toxic waste in the best way possible! (apart from not buying too much in the first place).
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Solve Your Addiction
How is your internet addiction today?
As the internet becomes an integral part of our lives, and more and more of us spend a significant part of our work day in front of a computer screen, many are finding that unhealthy addictions are alive and well in cyberspace, as well. Some (most?) are addicted to FaceBook, many to YouTube, others to Twitter and so on (then there’s crew.org.nz – a whole new level of there ain’t no going back!).
This is affecting everyone from students, to employees, to business owners (and often employers themselves). Grades are suffering, productivity goes south, and the bottom line gets lower and lower. How to solve the problem? Ultimately it is a question of discipline, but to assist with this is a site I came across recently, KeepMeOut.com:
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The Best Comeback Line of the Year
If you ever testify in court, you might wish you could have been as sharp as this policeman. He was being cross-examined by a defense attorney during a felony trial.
The lawyer was trying to undermine the policeman’s credibility…
Q: ‘Officer — did you see my client fleeing the scene?’
A: ‘No sir. But I subsequently observed a person matching the description of the offender, running several blocks away.’
Q: ‘Officer — who provided this description?’
A: ‘The officer who responded to the scene.’ Q: ‘A fellow officer provided the description of this so-called offender. Do you trust your fellow officers?’ A: ‘Yes, sir. With my life.’
Q: ‘With your life? Let me ask you this then officer Do you have a room where you change your clothes in preparation for your daily duties?’
A: ‘Yes sir, we do!’
Q: ‘And do you have a locker in the room?’
A: ‘Yes sir, I do.’
Q: ‘And do you have a lock on your locker?’
A: ‘Yes sir.’
Q: ‘Now why is it, officer, if you trust your fellow officers with your life, you find it necessary to lock your locker in a room you share with these same officers?’
A: ‘You see, sir — we share the building with the court complex, and sometimes lawyers have been known to walk through that room.’
The courtroom EXPLODED with laughter, and a prompt recess was called. The officer on the stand has been nominated for this year’s ‘Best Comeback’ line — and we think he’ll win.
(Courtesy of ‘Wheels’ of crew.org.nz forums fame)
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A little more political humour for the more intelligent
From a reader:
Snow White & the Seven Dwarfs
The seven dwarfs always left to go work in the mine early each morning.
As always, Snow White stayed home doing her domestic chores.
As lunchtime approached, she would prepare their lunch and carry it to the mine.
One day as she arrived at the mine with the lunch, she saw that there had been a terrible cave-in.
Tearfully, and fearing the worst, Snow White began calling out, hoping against hope that the dwarfs had somehow survived.
‘Hello! … Hello!’ she shouted. ‘Can anyone hear me?
Hello!’
For a long while, there was no answer.
Losing hope, Snow White again shouted, ‘Hello! Is anyone down there?’
Just as she was about to give up all hope, she heard a faint voice from deep within the mine, singing,
‘Vote for Winston Peters – Vote for Winston Peters’
Snow White fell to her knees and prayed, ‘Oh, thank you, God! At least Dopey is still alive.
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Google your past!
In celebration of their 10th anniversary, Google have put up a page linking to their oldest available index from January 2001.
Searching for such things as “iPod“, “broadband“, and even “Barack Obama” (yes – he did not just drop from a cloud in 2006) lead to some interesting results.
Of note to us types is a search for ADSL which leads the webarchive page of Telstra BigPond extolling the virtues of broadband. One would want it to be very virtuous with prices ranging from $189 (18 month contract) to $399 (3 months) for install. The plans themselves are a snip at a $89.50 for 200MB at 256kbps download speed and 64kbps up, or (more…)
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A full size keyboard that fits in anyone’s pocket
The Virtual Laser Keyboard has been around for a while now, and it looks to be hitting the spot for a number of people. Essentially the device projects a virtual keyboard on to a flat surface and can detect keys that are ‘hit’ and even supplies the clicking noise to go with it. (more…)
